...when I'm drunk.
Oh, be happy. Because if this doesn't entertain you (and truthfully, it's not really designed to do so, so fuck off if that's all you wanted), it'll at least mean I'm not using potentially compromised judgement (and certainly compromised patience) to ban you for not following simple rules that essentially amount to "don't assume you have more of a right to be an asshole on the internet then you would in real life".
Which I think neatly brought us to my general thesis here (god I love stream of consciousness! Doesn't work for my fiction, but works for other forms of writing I find), and that being: the responsibility of being me. Am I a terribly smart guy? I don't know. I mean, I'm TOLD I am...but I think this is actually a happy accident. I'm told IQ tests don't measure WHAT you know so much as what you CAN know. My mind seems to work as a steel trap for anything I find interesting or care about, but a laughable goddamn cheese grater like appliance for all else. But that back to responsibility.
If nothing else I have a high powered perception for people. I understand my group of friends much more then perhaps even they know. There's nothing inherently evil in that...it's just a fact. Sky is blue, up means above...I understand my friends to a degree they aren't entirely aware of I think and that I don't quite entirely share with them. Maybe I'm not unique in that, perhaps we all do it. Good point for discussion if anybody reads this. Once again tonight I am aware of my ability to manipulate if I so choose...and I don't choose, because my moral compass says manipulation is wrong, evil, and bad bad bad. But tonight I was once again somewhat confronted by that...to a degree by deprecating (of others) humor....I think I worry too much. Neurotic and yet still assured that my moral compass still has a "true north" that can be beneficial to others. What a complex creature the human is with that laid bare isn't it? This started out as a long form cryptic facebook post, and meandered into being about general human complication...hmmm...well, maybe there's something useful here if people can decipher it from the ramble and the alcohol. I guess my point is something like if you find yourself in a situation where you might be able to use whatever passive power you may have over people for bad outcomes...that you stop, think, and don't. That's it. Happy NGing to you.